Listen to your body. That’s fairly common advice for recreational runners. I’ve even doled it out at times myself. But I hate it. It makes no sense. Let’s be honest: if you listened 100% to your body, you’d never get out for a run! Your body lies to you. It tells you it’s tired and that it would rather sit on the couch. Once it gets going, often enough it’ll start humming along, but a lot of running and training to get faster is your mind convincing your body it can keep going. I’ve learned that my body very often wants to slow down, or stop. It is lazy.

This mind/body dichotomy becomes even more pronounced when training for a marathon. Most human bodies are capable of running 5K, 10K or even a Half Marathon with little to no training (and I don’t mean run them fast – I mean they can just cover the distance.) But the marathon is outside the realm of what our bodies are naturally designed to do. That is why we have to train them. We do this with long runs which push the boundaries of what we’ve previously been capable of, and by running more miles than what feels naturally comfortable. To successfully train for a marathon, you have to do the opposite of listen to your body. You have to learn to tune out your body’s whines and complaints. The more success you have in doing that, the more success you will have in the marathon. UNLESS… Unless your body is telling you to slow down or stop because it is getting injured, or over-tired, or a little too stressed to be able to recover. Then, you’re supposed to start paying attention again. This is what I’ve found so hard about marathon training. We get good at it because we learn to over-ride our bodies’ complaints, but then when we get injured someone will invariably say, “Well, you should have listened to your body.” When exactly?? On that 30K run when it was trying to tell me to stop at 20K? At 5:00 a.m. on Wednesday when it said it wanted to sleep in instead of getting up to run intervals? After my 5th hill when it told me my legs were tired even though I had 9 on my plan? Of course not! I never listen to it in those instances.

Right now I am nearing my peak in my current marathon training build. My body is tired and creaky and cranky. Every week a different niggle seems to crop up. Maybe my body is telling me that if I won’t listen to one injury it’ll just rotate them around until I pay attention? But what can I do now? Suddenly start listening?? I’m not even sure what to pay attention to! I only know how to keep going and tuning it out and pushing towards my goal – even if it seems to be getting a little less achievable every day.

And this is where wise people will say, “Listen to your heart or your gut.” To be honest, I have even less chance of hearing these organs. So back to ignoring my body, and hoping everything works out for the best …

I’ve heard people use the phrase “I workout so I can keep up with my kids.” I’ve always thought those were thoughts for older parents or really unfit people. As a competitive runner and enthusiast of many sports, I have never worried about being able to keep up with my kids. In fact it’s the opposite: I have always looked forward to the day when they would be able to keep up with me so we could go on athletic adventures together.

My kids are 9 (boy) and 7 (girl). They are generally active and athletic, but they don’t train formally for anything, so they aren’t specialists. Other than the monkeybars, they don’t do the same activity more than once a week. The result of this is that they are ok at most things, but neither of them are experts in any one sport. And I am in generally quite good shape as I run every day and am usually training for a race of any distance varying from 5K to the marathon. So I have always assumed it would be a long time before they’re waiting for me vs. me waiting for them.

But I am getting older, and they are growing quickly.

During our most recent family vacation, we decided to hike up the side of a mountain, for an adventure and to see the view. I wasn’t too worried about my 9 year old, but assumed there would be a lot of stopping and possibly even some complaining from my 7 year old. This is the guidebook’s summary of the trail:

SUMMARY:
This is a rugged and strenuous 5-mile trail from Maalaea to Ukumehame. This is an out-and-back hike with trailheads on either end. Both trailheads are close to sea level and the trail gains ~1600 ft. in 2.5 miles, then descends back toward sea level for another 2.5 miles. The Lahaina Pali Trail is rocky, and the uphill portions can be strenuous and slow-going. It will take a person in good physical condition ~3 hours one-way, including several short stops; give yourself 4-5 Hours if you are in a lesser state of conditioning or plan on taking longer breaks.

Sounded like fun to us! So we packed lots of water and set out.

My husband has very long legs (and is also quite fit), so I’m used to him walking ahead of me. My 9 year old skipped and ran alongside him to keep up. I figured I’d be the caboose with my daughter, and eventually with both kids. But I only ever saw the back of my son unless they were stopped and waiting for us. As I hiked up alongside my daughter, I realized it really was a tough climb. I was sweating and huffing and puffing. And she didn’t stop chatting once. She kept singing a song and asking me to sing it back to her. Honestly all my focus was on getting up the hill, so I kept forgetting the words. Finally she said “Mummy. It would sound better without all the hard breathing in between the words.” Touché. In my defense, I was the one carrying the pack with all of our water, but I still could not believe that both of my kids seemed to be outpacing me!

We finally caught up to my husband and son waiting for us 2/3 of the way up – an hour after we’d set out. Still not one complaint from either kid, but my husband and I decided that coming down would be tricky as well so we’d better turn around.

It turned out we were right. Coming down technical mountainous trails is very hard on your quads. And I was dead-last in our group. My daughter was very kind and waited for me, provided I continued to work on getting the words to the song correct. My husband and son were nowhere in sight.

So, I guess now I can add “so I can keep up with my kids” to my reasons when people ask me why I run. I really never thought it would come so quickly.

Many people say they have trouble remembering peoples’ names after they’ve been introduced. That’s a common problem but once you’re aware of it there are tricks you can use to compensate (for example, make a mental image of something which you associate with their name – such as a banana for someone named Hannah, or use their name a few times within your first conversation). But what if you have a hard time recognizing faces? This is an affliction which affects me, and it become even more pronounced when I see people out of context. More specifically, when I see them in any context other than running.

I have some good friends who I still struggle to identify if I see them in casual clothes or even worse – business clothes! It’s not uncommon for me to be walking down the street and hear “Hi Seanna!” If the speaker is in running clothes I identify them immediately. If not, I start to panic. I usually smile and wave, but depending on who it is (it could be someone I run with at least twice a week) that could be perceived as a somewhat cool response. Who is it, who is it? I try to take in height and facial features. But they just look SO different when they’re not in running tights and their hair in a ponytail! I now have some friends who very kindly accommodate my disability. My friend Meagan for instance whenever she sees me while she is not in running clothes says “Hi Seanna! It’s Meagan.” As if we were on the phone, not standing face to face, having just run together that morning.

All of this is compounded in the winter. My running group meets once a week at 5:30 a.m. in every type of weather. A few winters ago it was quite a brutal one, and you had to bundle up immensely in order to brave the cold. We had some new members join our crew for those 5:30 a.m. pitch dark, bundled up workouts. These workouts are quite a bonding experience, so you become close with your fellow crew members. We  encourage each other running up and down icy hills, or along windy stretches of path. We high-five and congratulate each other for completing tough workouts together. We even chat about non-running related things and know about each others’ families and work lives. But god help me if I had to recognize anyone who joined that winter without their signature blue jacket or red toque and face mask! Put us in business suits in an elevator together downtown and there would be absolutely no hope of any hint of recognition from me. And these are people I’d consider my good buddies!

I get the humour in my predicament, I really do. I just hope that no one takes it personally. I know there are many more awkward moments in my future, but I’m learning to roll with them. And my good friends are learning to understand that streetwear is a mystifying disguise for me – if they want to reveal their true identities they need to either spell it out, or wear their running jackets at all times.

There are many things I love about racing ‘shorter’ distances like 5K’s, 8K’s and 10K’s. I say ‘shorter’ because it seems everyone these days is training for a marathon or half marathon (not to mention those training for Half and full Ironmans!) These longer races are all amazing events and admirable goals to train for. I’ve been there and I’m sure I’ll come back to one or two. But these days they just require a bit too much time and structured training for my liking. You need to go with the flow of the stage you’re in, and right now my stage is “get everything done super quickly and efficiently and move on to the next thing” – which lends itself well to 5K training and racing.  So, to anyone who asks, I say I’m training for mostly 5K’s. However, I’ve discovered a serious flaw to my plan of “going with the flow” and jumping into 5K’s when they’re convenient. And that is that they never really are completely convenient and they often get re-prioritized! I have no one to blame for this but myself, but after a summer of saying I was racing 5K’s I only ended up starting two and finishing one (my DNF is another story…)

 

Some non-regretted summer experiences I chose over racing a 5K

It does suit me right now to be flexible and to be able to re-prioritize on the go.  Imagine having to say ‘no’ to a kid’s birthday party (they come up more frequently than you’d think), or a bike ride excursion with kids and friends, an invite to a cottage or a camping weekend with the family, because “Mom’s racing a 5K this weekend”? I truly would not enjoy that – no matter how fast I ended up running. I keep myself fit enough that I could jump into a 5K on any weekend and be either pleasantly surprised (it did happen this Spring) or have a bad race and question my training and racing strategy (see DNF). I never know because my training is never focused on one particular race. Again, this generally suits  my life right now, but after a few missed 5K races for other things that came up (plus my DNF), I realized I wasn’t giving enough respect and commitment to my races because they were “just 5K’s”. For any of my longer distance races in the past – from Half Marathons and up, my weekends were blocked off and my family and social schedules adjusted. Why did I feel I could justify the prioritization for those races just because they’re longer? In fact, I’m one of those people who loudly defends the 5K as not ‘just’ a 5K, as it too is an Olympic event, and you would never say an Olympian runs ‘just’ the 5K. Focusing on going faster over a shorter distance is just as commendable as completing a longer distance.

So, I’ve learned a lesson. If I really do care about the results of a race, I will have to plan for it – regardless of distance. I now have a “season” of fall races penned in (thanks in large part to a new coach who is guiding me) and they are written in my calendar in pen. If a birthday party, a cool excursion or some other fun sounding option comes up, I will still prioritize my race. Plus, it’s only a 5K – it won’t take that long 😉

 

As a general rule, I tend to avoid confrontation. I don’t enjoy being in altercations with people and I find there is little to gain by engaging people who seem to be ready for a fight at any moment. I have no ego involved in protecting my views and am generally completely fine with walking away without having the last word. I think this attitude has come to me with age: I’ve learned the value of peace vs. confrontation.

My run last week challenged my usual habits though. I was running along a pedestrian and bike lane on a shoulder of road where there is not a lot of pedestrian traffic. The lane connects two great running paths through parks, but for a few hundred meters it runs right beside four lanes of fast moving traffic. The cars in this area are not accustomed to pedestrians and bikes being around them – they tend to want to move fast. There is however a pedestrian crossing light which takes you across the four lanes and back into the safety of the trails. I approached the light just as it turned to the ‘WALK’ signal. A truck made a right hand turn in front of me as I was at the far side – that’s ok – he had time. But I was running and had started across as he was turning. There was a car attempting to turn behind him. I caught his eye as I ran towards him and flashed the peace sign as a signal of “thank-you – I’m crossing”. But somehow he was angered by the fact that I was running across the road in the pedestrian crossing area while the ‘WALK’ signal was clearly flashing. He was in a hurry and wanted to turn right. So he accelerated towards me, swerved around me and gave me a good HONK.

And that’s when my good-natured peace loving patience ran out. I stopped, turned around and yelled indignantly through his open windows, pointing to the ‘WALK’ signal and throwing in a few adrenaline-fueled expletives. As I was yelling I took in the scene in the car. There was a male driver with an older woman as a passenger (possibly his mother) and a young girl in a booster seat in the back. This did not stop me from reacting strongly. As much as the confrontation left me angry, slightly guilty for yelling and much less peaceful than if it had not occurred, I realized that some people need a wake-up call and this could possibly prevent future accidents. Hopefully that guy then got a stern talking to from his mother and is now driving much more cautiously.

I’m not saying I’ve never been in the wrong. I got my driver’s license a week after I turned 16, and I really don’t recall being very aware of bikes or pedestrians as a teenage driver. I can’t think of any specific incidences, but I am sure I was way less courteous than I am now. I’ve also been a new mother with a crying baby in the back, feeling every cry like a stab to the heart and viewing every obstacle between myself and getting home to feed my baby, whether bike, pedestrian or other car, as a direct threat and enemy. So I try not to judge, but that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have used a good wake-up call behind the wheel at times. Because when it comes to cars and pedestrians, it really is often about life and death. And maybe the person’s roof you just hit because they cut you off or came too close to you will become a little more aware and is now driving more cautiously. And maybe your confrontation, although it will likely bring a negative impact on your day, could prevent a future accident or death. So if you’re running and get cut off by a car, make a point and speak up for yourself and other pedestrians. And if you’re driving and get yelled at or have your roof hit by a cyclist or pedestrian, my words to you are this: suck it up, smarten up, and just take your medicine – we all need it now and then.